Explain the Internet to Your Grandparents

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hard · 180 min · Lv 7+ · The Starter Suburbs

Attempt to clarify concepts like "the cloud" and "WiFi" while maintaining your sanity and their dignity.

Rewards: 400 XP · 200 GT

Mobs

Loot via Grumpy Goblin

Mostly rusty things and resentment.

Item	Drop rate	Weight
Rusty Sword of Questionable Decisions	35%	3
Slightly Used Leather Boots	25%	2

Loot via Melodramatic Mime

Migrated loot table for Melodramatic Mime

Item	Drop rate	Weight
Helmet of Dubious Protection	32%	1
Cloak of Dramatic Entrances	24%	1

Loot via Philosophizing Orc

Migrated loot table for Philosophizing Orc

Item	Drop rate	Weight
Staff of Mild Irritation	28%	1
Boots of Unnecessary Speed	20%	1

Loot via Overzealous Squirrel

Region-weighted common pool for suburban quests.

Item	Drop rate	Weight
Stick of Mild Peril	40%	40
Boots of Apathy	35%	20
Coin of Infinite Pocket Lint	30%	30
Potion of Questionable Hydration	25%	10
Potion of Artificial Enthusiasm	18%	8